part 301:

“Bismillahir rahmaanir raheem”
-in the name of Allah, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful-

Me:”you think he’s gambling? I think he is…. That explains he’s getting miSsing for 2 days at a time… He’s probably spending those 2 days in the casino.. And it also explains where all the money has gone to…”

Ismail and I sat in bed that night, baffled as ever, as to what is going on with this man…. Its so unlike him… But people change… A lot! And we’ve seen that…

Ismail: “ha uh.. I don’t think its gambling….”

Me: “then what? Drugs? That explains his weird behaviour…”

Ismail: “nah… He’s too old for drugs and all such crap…”

Me: “true….but then what can be going on with him?”

Ismail: ” I just can’t believe he allowed all my hard work and effort to flush down the toilet like that….”

Me: ” just thank Allah that we were out before all this nonsense started….”

Imagine what life would be like if we were still living in that hell hole?… My children would grow up as corrupt as the people we were living with…

The days went by for us in the blink of an eye…

Normality was back in our lives and shukr there was a certain amount of calmness around… Maybe a little too much of calmness for my liking..

The kids were back to school and madressah, ismail was busy at work sorting things out, dada was… Well not himself… But adjusting to the new life he had to lead without dadi…. Humaira was settled back into some sort of routine…. And I was just busy with the daily duties of being mother and house wife…

A couple of months later, Salma and aqeel had finally found the perfect house in the perfect area and decided that it was finally time to move out of the haunted apartment of nightmares and into their new home….

A year into their marriage and alhamdulillah salma was over the moon that she’d finally fallen pregnant…

She was beginning to get angry and taking out on poor old aqeel.. She even snapped at him once, blaming him that it was all his fault that she couldn’t fall pregnant… Because how come he’d been married previously, also with no kids, so the problem was him…. Not her..

He didn’t deserve that… And salma knew it…. Aqeel was a sweet guy but in the end the frustration gets to us emotional beings at times and we always tend to take things out on the ones we love the most…. And who love and care about us the most….

When we’re tested with things like this, we don’t realise that its not anyones ‘fault’ as such but rather what Allah has predestined for us…

When Allah plans something, no-one has the power to change it… So as hard a thing it may be to be put through… Allah knows what’s best for us always…

So salma was just 2 months pregnant but was so excited that she began her shopping almost immediately….

“I’m getting old fay.. I need to have a baby before I get too old and my womb starts developing spider webs due it being so vacant….”

I laughed at salma and her craziness…..

My life was starting to get to me.. I too needed to do something meaningful with my life…

Now that dadi wasn’t around, dada had become a lot more reserved… He spent most of his time in his room making ibaadah…

I was really beginning to feel like a lonely person… And I was worried that this type of loneliness was going to affect me…

Yes I was busy with daily chores and humaira was now beginning to take steps and was quite busy, but I needed to do something for ‘ME’… Something that could keep me sane… Something that I could enjoy but still be pleasing Allah at the same time…

So when salma suggested that I join her for something on a weekly basis, I found myself considering it but wondering if ismail will ever allow me out of the house with anyone else besides himself or dada…..

Well how would I know if I didn’t take a chance to ask….

So one day when ismail was in a little bit of a good mood I plucked up the courage to ask him..

Even though he’d changed and wasn’t as possessive or abusive as he used to be, I was still petrified of asking him certain things for fear that he may just turn straight back into the evil beast that he used to be.. So I had to be very careful not to tick him off at just any given time…

“Err Babes… Salma goes to taaleem every wednesday afternoons and uhm…… I was just wondering if I could join her sometimes?”

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4 thoughts on “part 301:

  1. sister/in/Islam says:

    Yay !!!!! A new post – ​​​الحمد لله …….
    Hmmmm … Poor man , wonder what has gotten in2 him ???!!!!

    Wen u use 2 being with some1 n then they r gone , the loneliness can become too much to handle … Would b Lovely if Ismail agrees to her going for Taleem …..let’s wait n seeeeeee !!!!!!

    جزاك اللهُ خيراً

  2. Sister A. says:

    الْحَمْـّدُاللَّه Salma is pregnant.
    Its a good idea 4 Faaiza 2 occupy herself °̩и sumthing other than housewrk αи∂ serving the famly. Hp Ismail agrees to let her go 4 Ta’leem.

  3. A says:

    It is truly difficult for men to adjust to life without their life partner
    Maybe Ismail’s father got another wife….
    Mubarak to Salma on her new house n pregnancy, may ALLAAH grant her an easy pregnancy n barakah I her house n family Life can become very monotonous wen we get to absorbed in routine
    Hope Ismail allows her to go for Taaleem

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