part 298:

“Bismillahir rahmaanir raheem”
-in the name of Allah, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful-

Dadi was fortunately buried in jannatul baqi….. And dada refused to come home earlier… Ofcourse it would give him closure.. To spend more of his time there, praying for his beloved wife… In the blessed city of peace… The city of our honourable prophet( sallallaahu alayhi wa sallam)

I worry about dada… Dadi and him never left eachother for even a moment.. They grew old together and did everything together…

“There are quite a few south african families” dada said… “And they’ve been of great support my child…. I’ll be okay… No need for any of us to shorten our trips… Dadi would never want to cause any such kind of inconvenience for us.. Besides, what should we rush to go home for? Not like there’s anything waiting for us there…”

He was so right.. Dadi was gone and we needed to accept it.. That she wasn’t going to be waiting with a hot pot of chicken curry and roti like she always did…

My mind kept on wandering to our last meeting.. We had both cried like it was the last time we would see eachother.. Did dadi know? I know they say that sometimes people already know when they’re going.. They see signs…. Not sure if that’s true though…

Maryam and salma decided that its best we have a small yaaseen khatam for dadi that very night.. And also a khatam of first kalimah as this is known to be of benefit for the deceased… Its so different to mourn the death of someone when there’s no actual body infront of you… We are so used to the mayyit being brought infront of us and then picked up to leave for the qabrastaan…

I cried at the restaurant… More out of shock than anything else… But once I was brought back to my senses, I found a different type of strength… This consolation, knowing that dadi had received what she lived herself to die for…

I couldn’t really do much for the rest of the days that were left in london…I felt bad that everyones holiday was spoilt.. And no-one forced me either.. Everyone was quite understanding and supportive.. And assured me that I had nothing to feel bad about.. This was Allahs way of making us realise that we enjoy life but forget that we are all going to leave this world oneday… That we need to remember death no matter what we find ourselves in life…

Having people that care so much around you really makes dealing with situations easier..

But once we were back home, I felt it… The loneliness… The walking past dadis room…. The emptiness in the house… And dada could feel it too, even though he tried not to show it..

Things were different… Its almost as if though we expected her to just walk into the kitchen at any given moment and ask us what she could make for us today…

When the kids were not well, I craved dadis concern and advise for home remdies or dutch medicine..

Dadi always knew the solution to everything..

I never found the courage to walk into dadis room… Even though dada was still there… If I needed dada, I would stand outside the room and call for him..

We didn’t even get to recover from our holiday and the unpacking seemed to have taken almost the whole week.. Not because we had so much of luggage.. But because the house was buzzing with people once again…

Daddys siblings tried convincing dada to move in with them… To rotate… To move from one to the other, but dada was wise enough to understand that that won’t be such a good idea..

He chose to stay here.. Where he lived with his wife.. Where he shared memories with her and where he made a life….

He understood and appreciated the concern of his other kids.. But there was no reason to run away or around…

I was all too glad… I wouldn’t cope if dada too had to leave.. That would leave me alone… All alone… No blood family anymore….

Yes ismail was there.. And the kids… But ismail was not blood… He was my husband, I understand… But dada was the only remaining family that I had left…

My kids are too young to fill that void.. Yet they do at certain times…

The dreaded day had come when all the mourners stopped coming and it was eventually time for me to sort out all dadis possessions… To clear out her cupboards, give her clothes away and the only way to do this was to enter her room…


7 thoughts on “part 298:

  1. sister/in/Islam says:

    Sad !!!!!!!
    If we don’t get to see the actual funeral – it takes awhile to accept that they r gone and to move on with life !! N Dadi was such a wonderful n helpful person !!! And older ppl r so wise and they give lots of duas !!

    Hope she gets thru this mourning period quickly !!

    جزاك اللهُ خيراً

  2. Sister A. says:

    Soo sad! ! ! 😥 😥 😥
    That’s reality. We all hav 2 leave dis world 1 Đά̲ƴ. Nobody knows when their visa of life is goin 2 xpire. May ﷲ grant us all da Tawfeeq of spending da remainding days of our lives °̩и a manner dat is pleasing 2 him, preparing ourselves 4 our meeting with Him ​آمِيْن. May He grant Sabr 2 all those who hav lost their loved ones ​آمِيْن. Faaiza & family r goin 2 feel da emptiness with Dadi’s absense. 😦 May ﷲ mk it easy 4 dem.

  3. A says:

    It’s so sad!!!!
    May ALLAAH make it easy for Faaiza on the Ioss of her Dadi
    Sometimes ALLAAH works in mysterious ways which we will never understand in that ALLAAH took Faaiza out of the gremlin’s house, brought Maryam n Imraan into her life then took dadi away so she had a support system behind her so her loss was not so great also she moved into the house with dada n dadi so dada at least had someone with him when he came

  4. sister/in/Islam says:

    Hmmmm … Mrs S !!! There r 2 more posts n then u reach 300 !!!
    Subhanallah !!!

    And ….

    And ….

    That’s calls for a celebration !!!!

    Soooooooooo ……

    Mayb ….
    Just mayb ………..

    Pretty PLEASE …. Wonderful Author !!!
    (Just trying my luck !!)

    جزاك اللهُ خيراً

  5. I’ve also heard that ‘people know when they’re about to leave’ in retrospect you realize that they said things that were hinting that they were going, but the truth is that we don’t know when we’re leaving. We don’t know when our time will be up. I think Allah puts it in us to say such things but we only truly realize its time up when we see the angel of death.

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