part 281:

“Bismillahir rahmaanir raheem”
-in the name of Allah, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful-

Oh yes…. Abdurahmans wedding.

Abdurahman had apparently found a lovely wife and was ready to settle down.. She happens to be an aalima and is also from the UK…

She teaches in the local madressah there.. Infact she studied here in south africa at one of the darul ulooms for 5 years and has been doing a lot of deeni work ever since she graduated 2 years ago..

She was from a good home and good family.. Not the gremlins idea of good.. But the proper idea of good… Good in the eyes of Allah..

They have only met once, on the day that he went to ‘see’ her at her home..real samoosa run I hear. he read his istikhaarah and so did she.. This was just last month… They proposed just before coming over to visit us and tasneems mum gave her answer immediately over the phone…

She said that there was no need for all those unnecessary formalities which are usually done..

we go for a samoosa run… Then we need to go and propose.. Then we need to come back for an answer… Then we need to come for an engagement… Then we need to come again for setting the date… And it goes on and on… Totally unnecessary in islam…

So that’s how they did it.. Sweet and simple.. Proposal and answer all in 1…

The date was set for some time in december..

So maryam expects us to be there.. I wonder if that’s ever possible..

I’ve never been anywhere before and the thing is, that even though ismail has no complains about money at the moment, because shukr to Allah, the filling stations been running smoothly and his salary at the end of the month doesn’t get used for many expenses since dada sees to most of our household needs..

So ismail is okay right now… Financially I mean.. And not forgetting his shares from the furniture store that he’s receiving from the UK.. And that’s not in rands.. Its in pounds.. Not that I’m benefiting much…

I’ve never really benefited from ismails money…

Even though he earned ‘peanuts’ before.. I was never involved in his financial issues.. Which I think is so important for couples… I feel a man needs to discuss the finances of the home and his earnings etc with his wife.. They supposed to be best friends.. Why should these things be hidden and done secretly?

I admire people who sit down at the end of every month and work out a budget together.. As one big happy family.. But that’s how I feel.. Others may have their own opinion or reasons as to why its never discussed..

My point is that I’m not sure if he’ll take us.. Because that’s just how ismail is..selfish if you ask me….My kids don’t even have passports for goodness sake… They’ve never even applied for one since they were born And frankly, I’m sure that mine is expired aswel.. I haven’t really checked since there was never any need to..

December will be great though.. It will be school holidays.. So no miSsing out on school..

And humaira will be over her newborn stage…

And dadi and dada were planning to go for umrah together..

They always loved to go for umrah in december..

Dada complains of south africa in december.. Too much of fitnah everywhere.. Too much of dancing and music and too much of partying… He always fears that if Allahs athaab comes down because of all the corruption going on around him, he doesn’t want to be destroyed with everyone… And its not only in south africa.. Its all over the world… The festive season is celebrated globally so there’s nowhere that one can actually be saved from the corruption besides the holy lands..

So for the past couple of years they’ve been going for umrah in december..

I know I’m fantasising now… But what’s the worst that can happen? Ismail can just say no…

Maybe I should talk to ismail about going for the wedding.. He’s been there already, so It will be really unfair if he disagrees… And if he agrees, it will be so different for a change.. Maybe that’s what I really need.. A change in atmosphere… A change from the monotony of life…

**Authors note:
Let’s not leave our challenges incomplete..our durood challenge 21 needs another 7 000 durood to be completed.. Let’s contribute
please comment and let me know if you think that I should continue with the durood and kalima tayyibah challenges…




11 thoughts on “part 281:

  1. sister/in/Islam says:

    Hmmmmmm ……. Lovely opportunity !!!!! But we’l hav2 see wat Mr Ismail has2 say ….. Hopefully he agrees , it’l b such a wonderful experience for all of them .
    N I totally agree abt the spouses being open with each other with regards to finances – they should b each others confidants in all aspects ……. Helping each other out ……

    جزاك اللهُ خيراً

  2. zana says:

    Just had a feeling it was going to be Abdurahmans wedding
    you so right we have so many stories when it comes to proposals and getting our answers. May allah guide us in theses matters
    Men are all different some can discuss anything. Others don’t
    No harm in asking. The worst he can say is no. But u think our ismail has changed in these past few months.

    Sister S please add paras 12 ,13 and 14

  3. A says:

    ما شاءالله
    It is so heartwarming to see ppl trying to practice on the sunnah bcoz today wen u tell someone that nikaah should be made asap after the engagement then everyone looks at u like u r backward
    Also Apa Fatima Loonat so beautifully said that we want to bring the cultures of the Hindus, Christians n Jews n then we ask y is there no barakah in our marriages today
    It is so important that spouses must sit together n discuss finances
    Faaiza ask Ismail nicely m tell him his mother wants them there n ان شاء الله by the next post we’ll read that he agreed to go ( making lots of duaa)

  4. Sister A. says:

    إِنْ شَاءَ اللَّهُ Ismail ωɪℓℓ say yes. Will b a nyc holiday 4 Faaiza & the children.
    I think its important 4 couples 2 discuss their Finances.

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