part 203:

‘Bismillahir rahmaanir raheem’
(In the name of Allah, the Most kind, The Most Merciful)

I lay in bed resting that night thinking once again about mummy and daddy…would things have been different if they were around….? I know its taqdeer and this is just how Allah had planned things out…

Daddy was always a very wise man and he most definitely would have given ismail the best advice regarding what he should do…I guess daddy got that from dada….dada is an ocean of wisdom….I suppose that comes with age and much experience..

I know its tough on ismail but I would do anything for just an extra moment with my parents…why can’t ismail just realise that..why can’t he just give it a go and visit his mum?

But I know that its too late..I will never get that opportunity of seeing my parents or even giving them one final hug ever again in this life…but hopefully we’ll be reunited on the day of qiyaamah and if we’re fortunate enough to enter jannah…

I wonder if mummy and daddy look down upon me and are proud of me for how I am living my life or are they disappointed at the way I’ve turned out…

“That’s stupid faaiza”…..its not about whether mummy and daddy are pleased with me but rather, ‘is Allah and His nabi(S.A.W) pleased with me for how I’ve turned out’…

Sad is my life..honestly…in 30 somewhat years I don’t have much that I’ve actually accomplished..there’s so much more I could have done…

I mean if Allah takes my life at this given moment….am I ready to face Him?will we ever be ready to face Him?

All this thinking was making me so sleepy and today has bee one really long day..all I need right now is a good sleep….I was about to doze off when I heard some noises outside my room….I was sure that ismail was with aqeel and usually when he’s out, he ends up coming home really late….so it couldn’t be him

The kids were long ago in lala land…and they are such heavy sleepers..they don’t ever wake up in the middle of the night..

And dada and dadi hardly ever come upstairs….and they too sleep immediately after esha so its easier for them to wake up for tahajjud salaah at 3:30 every morning…

I was starting to get scared..I know I have to have faith in Allah and I’m always lecturing ismail to…but honestly, when you’re actually faced with the situation its when you actually need to start believing and having true conviction….

My heart was beating really fast as I slowly creeped out of bed without even switching on my bedside lamp…

I tiptoed to the door which was left slightly open…

I liked leaving the door open abit incase the kids need to come in during the night…I know that they can open the door but I just felt safer to leave it open abit…

My breathing was getting heavier…as it is its so difficult to breathe because of my pregnancy weight at the moment…

I peeped out of the door and noticed a figure coming towards the room…..

What was I going to actually do?look at the intruder and scream?what if he had a gun?or a knife?

I didn’t even have my phone in my hand to dial ismails number quickly…

All I could think of was to read ayatul kursi in my mind…
Allaahu laa’ilaaha illaa huwal hayyul qayyoom……

I’ve heard that it should be read for protection at any time…

One who recites Ayatul Kursi every morning will be in the protection and safety of Allah until the night

if one recites Ayatul Kursi before going to sleep, Allah will send an Angel to come and look after you and protect you…

Oh no…I was so busy thinking and contemplating that I was falling asleep without reciting ayatul kursi and my usual sleeping duas..

When one is alone in the house, recitation of Ayatul Kursi and asking Allah for help will make you remain calm and you will not fear.

AaaaaaaaaaaaaaaH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Authors note:
Next post will inshallah be tomorrow morning and then khatam 5 and durood challange 2 will inshallah commence..

silent living-foreveramessup.wordpress.com

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5 thoughts on “part 203:

  1. sister/in/Islam says:

    Ooooh MAaaaaan !!!! U expect me to sleeeep now !????!!!! With this suspense ?????!!!!!!!

    Lol …….. Its ok , I’ll try n not let my mind conjure up any wierd scenes …… Will practice some Sabr ‎​​إنشاءالله !!!!!!!

    ‎​​​​جزاك الله …….. Always wonderful and interesting posts ….

  2. A says:

    It’s so true sometimeswen u start thinking about the what ifs then ur mind can play havoc with u n I’m the process one can forget we need to read our kalimah n Duaa before sleeping
    Hope Faaiza is ok
    Suspense…..

  3. a95r says:

    Maybe its ismail? Fay didn’t hear the car or the door unlocking because she was so deep in thought? Hope it is that rather than an intruder…

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