This is a bonus post because alhamdulillah we have reached 200 000 views….jazakallah to all of ytou for the great support and for the many comments and feedback that comes in daily…I may not always be able to reply to every comment, but I do read every single one of them….and will try my best to reply whenever I can…
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Me:”guess you’ll just have to wait and find out…..(Giggle)”
Sal:”don’t be mean fay…..you said yourself…we’re sisters….you can not…hide this from me…”
Me:”whi said I can’t?its a surprise….ismail, myself and the doctor knows….and everyone else will find out in another 4 months time inshallah….”
Sal:”that’s just nasty……”
Me:”no its not….imagine how boring it will be when you hear that I gave birth….you’ll be like ‘oh…………….’ And then you can’t even be excited and ask…’Oh that’s so nice, what did she get?’ Because you’ll already know…”
Sal:”(giggle)…whatever….I’ll get you back for that…just wait and I’ll figure it out sometime….anyway…I gotto go sweety…I now have a house to run you know(giggle)….can’t sit around on the phone the whole day…”
And with that our call ended…it was a rather normal day for me, basic house duties to see to….
At the supper table that day riyaad happened to mention:
“mama apa was crying today in madressah”
Raadiya:”you know those children in our class…those bigger girls……attiyah and ameerah?”
Raadiya:”there mummy was fighting with apa…”
Oh my word…apa is such a softie…I hope she’s ok…I decided to give her a call later to find out if she’s ok..not because I want to be nosey, but it hurts me to see how some people have no respect for people who sacrifice their time to teach your kids…especially those who teach deen….why do we take so much of advantage?they deserve respect….but let me not judge as yet….I’ll find out what really happened first…
I finished up with supper and clearing up and once the kids were tucked in I dialled apas number…
Me:”wa alaykum salaam..maaf to trouble apa..its faaiza speaking..the twins mummy?”
Apa:”jee jee..no trouble at all…how you doing?”
Me:”alhamdulillah shukr and how’s apa doing?”
Apa:”shukr I’m well alhamdulillah…shame has there been a problem?something I can help with?”
Me:”no no, not at all.I just called to find out if apa is ok?..the kids mentioned that apa was a little upset today in madressah…”
Apa:”(giggle)..no maaf, don’t worry..inshallah everything will be ok…(Sigh)…you know we try..but unfortunately we can’t please everyone…(Pause)..you know, tell me, do you find the system we use to be discouraging in any way?please be honest…”
Me:”what do you mean, what system?shukr my kids have learnt so much in this short time that they’ve been with apa…I can’t think of any reason to complain…”
Apa:”hmmm…what about the merit and demerit system that we’ve adopted?do you find it discouraging to the kids?are you all feeling pressurised by madressah rules?”
Me:”apa, please explain to me what the other parent had a problem with..not because I just want to know your business but so that I can understand more or less where you’re coming from…”
Apa began explaining…..
You see, apa runs a private madressah on her own, while her husband has a separate job…she has a progress book where daily she writes what work has been done in class and what needs to be learnt or revised at home….
She encourages the performance of salaah etc…
If a child does well in class for the day, they receive merits for quraan, surahs and duas….for every salaah performed they receive a merit…after every 10 merits a little gift is received after which the child would start again from one and try to reach 20 merits..after which again a little bigger gift is given….and so on..everytime starting from one and increasing the goal…
If a child stays absent, doesn’t learn, forgets kitaabs at home, doesn’t complete work or doesn’t perform any salaah or for any bad behaviour…one merit is taken away..this is known as a demerit….once all merits are taken away, demerits are received…once 10 demerits are received…unfortunately the child is suspended for a week….
All the younger students take this very seriously and enjoy the challenge…always trying to get the most merits in class…however the older girls….well not too old, between the ages of 10 and 13….find this very discouraging….they just don’t find it necessary to be given demerits..they feel that they are too old for such things and they lose interest if they’re given demerits….and therefore don’t perform well in class at all…