This is your surprise post as promised….all because I’ve reached 60 000 views in total….jx to all of you for the great amount of support and commenting…next post will inshalah be tomorrow….
Ismail ran into the house and returned after 5 mins with the kids all excited…..
Riyaad:”mama…daddys taking us for milkshake……yipppeee!”
Ismail smiled at me and I gave him a hug back…
We drove to milky lane and ordered our yummy favourites….a regular milo milkshake for me, a coffee shake for ismail, a lime milkshake for raadiya and bubblegum for riyaad….
Me:”hmmm…just what we needed to cool our moods off hey babes…(Giving him a light kiss on the cheek)”
Ismail:”I don’t understand why everyones all gaga over wakaberry, haagen dazs and smooch….when the tradition oldies are just tooo yumm….(Slirping on his last bit of milkshake)”
That night I sat with riyaad and radiya and went over abit of their madressah work with them…they had no school work as grade R’s weren’t given any over the weekends….
Me:”so yaad…everything been okay at school?those mean little boys still troubling you?”
Riyaad:”not so much mama…I just play far from them during break….but they’re really naughty boys…especially the fat one…his name is mohsin….but his very rude, even to our mu’allima(teacher)”
Me:”as long as they’re not troubling you guys….if they do…you should go immediately to your mu’allimah okay?”
Riyaad:”but mama mu’allimah shouted at them the other day for troubling another girl in our class…she told them she was going to give them a demerit….”
Riyaad:”no!but mohsin even shouted back at muallimah….you know what he told her mama?”
Me:”no baby..what did he tell her?”
Riyaad:”he told her ‘so what?’ I don’t care about your demerits….I already get whatever I want…so it doesn’t matter”
Me:”oh no!that’s so rude….we shouldn’t be disrespecting our elders ever okay kiddos?….its really important to be respectful and not ever back chat anyone…”
Its sad, really…..as parents we don’t discipline our kids enough….we don’t teach them the difference between adult and child..we think its okay for our kids to talk to us however they feel like..its sad to see that most of our indian kids are the ones with the least amount of discipline and manners….
We often believe that by giving them what they want and allowing them all the freedom, it is showing them how much we love them..little do we realise that we are actually damaging these young kids…
I’ve seen it so many times with rukayas kids aswel, that when her kids make certain rude or vulgar statements, everyone laughs as if they’d said something so hilarious…..and the comment usually passed is ‘oh they sound so cute…and innocent!’
By laughing at this type of behaviour we are only making them think that what they’ve done is impressive and they’ll only want to keep on doing it…however if a stern look is given at that moment and sometimes a good Spanking, the child will know that what they’ve said or done is unacceptable….
A child cannot always think for themselves…they don’t always know what is right and wrong…we have to teach them by being strict when something wrong is done and praise them when something good is done..
People often feel that we’re too harsh on our kids when we scold them for being naughty and unmannered….the statement often made is ‘leave them!they’re only kids’…
Oh how it boils my blood when people say that..so what?are we supposed to always leave them to do as they please because they’re kids? And discipline them only when they’re grown up?well to me its easier to discipline a kid than trying to change the habits of a fully grown adult….
I always think of riyaad and radiya, even though its a couple of years from now, but as someones elses wife or husband….if I’m not going to teach them good behaviour, they’re not going to know how to treat their spouses oneday and then their children are going to look at them and learn incorrectly and it all boils down to me not teaching them correct etiquette of anything…..
Once we were done and I was satisfied that my kids knew their work well enough, I got them ready for bed and read my esha…..
Ismail was busy talking to someone outside…wasn’t sure who it was though….I really feel my hubby sorry…he’s been through so much throughout his sad life…..I make dua that Allah changes his familys hearts and softens them no matter what it takes….it shouldn’t be that they’re returned to Allah with a heart as hard as a rock…with no pity or regrets for anything they’ve done….
Maybe they are the way they are because they hardly ever talk about Allah..they hardly ever perform salaah…quraan is read only on a jumu’ah and a little extra in ramadaan…throughout the year there’s hardly any talking to or about Allah…everything to them is about money and materialistic things…and what they can do next to get popularity…
Our nabi(s.a.w) was so perfect..he taught us that “Don’t hold too much talk without remembrance of Allah,
for certainly excessive talk without remembrance of Allah
produces hardness of heart.”
I forgive them from the bottom of my heart…as Allah has said that we should forgive others as much as we’d love for Him to forgive us….and as sinful as I am…I’d be doomed if Allah didn’t forgive me…
Ofcourse I will be keeping my distance though….I don’t need any more outbursts like today…
I was just about to get into bed when ismail walked into the room smiling…he looked very anxious to let out something…..